A little more about me
I didn’t come to therapy because id always planned to become a therapist. In fact, my first experience of it wasn’t particularly helpful.
It was years later, through my own experiences of loss, family life and trying to make sense of things id carried for a long time, that i began to understand what therapy could actually be.
My Story
How i found my way into therapy
I first tried counselling after my dad died from a sudden , aggressive cancer. I was in my twenties and looking back, i probably wasn’t coping particularly well. My wife, who has always been one of my biggest supports, suggested i speak to someone.
I gave it a go but it felt cold and transactional – like paying for a service rather than genuinely heard. I came away thinking, maybe therapy isn’t for me.
Years later, after losing my mum to cancer, I knew i needed help again. This time was different. I found a therapist who really made me feel safe. They didn’t rush me, judge me, or try and tell me how i should feel. They gave me the space to explore things I hadn’t even realised i was carrying, and i began to understand myself – and some of my relationships – differently.
Not long afterwards on a family holiday, i woke one morning feeling completely flat, id lost my sense of purpose. My wife asked me a simple question. What would you do if you didn’t have to worry about money?
I knew the answer. I wanted to help people in the way i had eventually been helped.
That first decision took me back to college and eventually training as a therapist, alongside the other people in my life – being in the emergency services, husband and dad.
Those experiences still shape how i work today. I know what its like to sit on the other side of the room, to wonder whether therapy is really for you, and to discover how different it can feel when you find someone you can actually talk to.
There’s more to me than being a therapist
Therapy is part of my life, but it isn’t all of it.
Alongside my practice, I’ve spent more than two decades in the emergency services. I’m a husband and a dad and much of what i understand about people hasn’t only come from books or training – it has come from life, relationships, loss, responsibilities and spending years around people when things weren’t always straightforward.
I think it matters in the therapy room, I don’t expect people to arrive speaking the language of therapy or knowing exactly what they’re feeling. You can just arrive as yourself and we work from there.
Away from the therapy room
Outside work, life is fairly ordinary. Family matters a lot to me. I enjoy getting outdoors, training, travelling and the occasional attempt at slowing down. I think having a life outside of therapy helps me remain grounded in the real world that my clients are actually living in.